Growth Shouldn't Make You Feel Guilty

Missing out on Saturday parties. Long hours in your office while your kids swim in the pool. Constantly being asked "Are you going to be done soon?"

Raise your hand if you're there. Keep it up if you feel guilty about it.

Whether or not your spouse begs for a date night or your kids give you puppy eyes to come play with them (or real puppies giving legit puppy eyes), it's easy to feel guilty trading your family time for business time.

Of course you can protect your work hours and family hours, but let's be real, when you're starting a business, in busy season, or your business is growing and booming, you have to work when the work is there. In order to make more money to give your family an awesome life, you have to make some sacrifices.

But growth shouldn't make you feel guilty.

Growing your business. Taking on new clients. Doubling your workload (and your income). Surpassing your goals. These should all be things to be CELEBRATED, not make you feel like absolute crap because you're telling your kids you can't play with them and your spouse has to eat cereal for dinner because you're too busy to cook.

You don't have to quit your business. You don't have to sacrifice your family time. You don't have to feel guilty. You just have to quit your bad habits.

Bad Habit #1: Telling yourself that YOU have to do it all.

News alert. You don't. Unless you live alone (and then there's no one bugging you), you have other people who live in your house. They can (and should) help with chores, finish other tasks, complete things on their own. And if they can't help, outsource what you can. Instacart for groceries (place your order and your spouse can get it put into their car curbside on their way home). A Neato or Roomba for some daily vacuuming (it won't get EVERY dog hair but hey, it's enough to keep you from having to vacuum every single day yourself).

Bad Habit #2: Ask for help specifically.

How I ask my husband for help greatly impacts the result.

A) "I need to xyz, can you make dinner tonight please?"

Starting with "I" almost makes him turn off his listening ears because he thinks I'm just telling him what's on my to do list. It also sets up a struggle; because "I have to _____, so can you ______ ?" poses it as "My needs are priority right now so you have to pick up the slack."

Once he's resigned himself to making dinner while I work, the questions start: "What do you want?" "How do I make that?" "Do we have the ingredients?" Suddenly, I'm in the kitchen pulling everything out, getting the Pinterest recipe, telling him how I alter the recipe, and then it makes more sense for me to just do it myself.

B) "Will you make beef stew in the Instapot for dinner tonight so I can finish this up? We have everything and I'll pull up the Pinterest recipe."

It requires no extra thinking or decisions or assistance from me after that and he's good to go. If I give him a plan and directions, he's happy as a clam and doesn't mind making dinner.

Phrasing is everything.

Bad Habit #3: You're bargaining.

And not the good kind of bargaining. Bargaining comes in many different ways, usually trying to convince yourself of something and starts with "well... if I _____, then I can _____" (If I just stay up late after the kids go to bed, I can get 5 hours of editing in a night).

A business's primary goal is to make money and it seems like backwards thinking to try to grow by spending money. Entrepreneurs are inherent DIYers and will learn just about anything to save a few dollars. But by DIYing, you could actually be costing yourself money rather than protecting it.

Let's run an example here.

A photographer has a basic website and charges $1200 for wedding coverage. She wants to update her website to attract higher end clients.

Option A: Redo her website herself (free). In the 4 months it takes her to launch her website, she books 2 more weddings ($2400). TOTAL: +$2400

Option B: Buy a template/hire someone to redo her website ($500-$1000). It takes 1 month for the website to launch and in the next 3 months, she books 3 weddings at her new price point of $2200 ($6600) TOTAL: +$6100 (or $5100 if she hired someone).

Makes sense, right? But even with these numbers, I'm sure you'll find yourself bargaining about why you should save money and do xyz yourself. You shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to speed up your process and be able to make more money!

Growth is a GOOD thing. It should be celebrated, bragged about, making your feel like a million bucks! If it's not, think through why you're not feeling awesome, why does it feel crappy, and what can you do to FIX it.

Based out of Burleson, Texas

Available for awesomness Worldwide

Copyright Tyssa Watson, LLC 2020